Bean Town Mary Jeys

I went to Boston last week. On top of it being a refreshing break from this hot and sticky overpopulated town, it was a chance to revisit how the other towns do this art thing.

Boston has no equivalent place to Chelsea/Soho/57th Street. There is no home base for galleries. As far as I know, there is only one place to see contemporary art of note, Barbara Krakow. Unfortunately, her gallery is on like the 3rd floor in the shopping district and is pretty much the most uninviting gallery I've ever tried to enter. I didn't know where I was, the door was closed and there was detritus all over the hallway.

This makes me think that the Boston gallery market doesn't really count on the "looky-loos." (thanks D.Hickey) If you are interested in spending real money on art in Boston, you make an appointment. If you just want to look around, you have your choice: cape cod seascapes, found at your local seaside tourist shoppe, or the Museum of Fine Arts.

I opted for the MFA (huh,). There were two temporary exhibits. One was the special "pay-extra, view-at-alotted-time-slot", the other was a "view-at-liesure". The Quilts of Gees Bend was the latter and is a show I highly recommend for everyone. It sounds boring, but if you get a chance, just wander through, it's all about the way these sewn minimalist patterns work way better than anything a painter ever did. (props to Roy)

The pay-to-see show was something called "Speed, Style, and Beauty: Cars From the Ralph Lauren Collection". This is a typical non-show. Look at cars! They're the art sitting in right in your garage! (Or in the overcharged parking spot as you view the exhibition) I mean, I like cars. I even like NASCAR. And yes, I have a favorite, The Bugatti (pictured above). But the show gave us nothing about a culture/society outside of our own. Part of a museum's draw is a peek into another time or into another place. To look at a famous designer's car collection is to look in a mirror- like Entertainment Tonight- but in a museum, it should work reflexively: why do we care? It wouldn't be so bad if it were a deep look, but too often museums won't offend paying visitors for the money shot to expose our over zealous obsession with celebrity and opulescence. This show is no exception. It's all about this one guy's collection. This guy who owns some stylish, and admittedly, old cars and has a fortune from making up-market clothing. I think it truly exposes the nature of special exhibitions at major museums. It's all just hobnobbing with stars.

Imagined conversation with Ralph Lauren and exhibition curator, Darcy Kuronen:

***ring! ***ring! ***
DK: Special curator du jour, how may I help you?
RL: Oh hi, Darcy. I uh, hey, can I ask you a question?
DK: Who is this?
RL: Oh, sorry, it's Ralph.
DK: Son, I told you, pranks aren't allowed while I'm at work!
RL: What? No No, really, it's Ralph. Ralph Lauren.
DK: Oh, oh. Lipschitz! What up, dog?
RL: Yeah, Darce. I have these cars see, and they're just collecting dust right?
DK: Yeah, I haven't worked at that car garage in quite some time, I don't even know anyone there that could give you a tire air discount anymore.
RL: No, the expensive cars, in my collection. I was wondering if you were curating anything at the moment.
DK: Your cars? What, have they been sat in by Jennifer Aniston, and Brangelina?
RL: ...No. Uh....no, I spent a lot of money on these vehicles over the decades, and I have run out of money to pay insurance on them. Also, I've had some credit problems. Anyway, I wanted to free up the garage for a new clothing line. Is there any free space in the Museum's schedule?
DK: Hmm, let me see... I think we can make this work, right between some real art, Ah yeah, let's just bump the Quilts...
RL: to downstairs. Yeah, no one's going to pay special price for some sewing. The people want to look at things they can't have.
DK: I bet we can even dig up some drawings from our archive. I think we can do this in July, but Ralph, I'm not sure that we can give you a publishing deal.
RL: Darcy... I, didn't.
DK: We can't do glossy, and gift shop paraphernalia won't be ready.
RL: You won't make me... I don't have any spare...
DK: I'm sorry Lip, we just can't.
RL: ...
DK: ...
RL: Fine, you can have a custom fit design of your choice for the show's opening only.
DK: Oh, huh. I just remembered, I think we've got some new meat in our publishing department with something to prove, I'm sure we can work things out.
RL: I knew you'd help, you're such a pal. See you on Fire Island?
DK: All summer!